To Homeschool or Not to Homeschool; that is the Question.

You homeschool your kids?

I get this question…a lot!

Yes, we do. But let’s clarify; I do not homeschool because I think I'm better than a trained teacher. I’m far from it and I doubt myself all.the.time. But the freedom and choices our family has gained because we've chosen to rise above that fear are worth all the questioning in the world. So let’s talk about this decision to swim upstream.

The Beginning

We don't need to go down the route of 2020. There are plenty of blogs written about that old chestnut, and we all remember it, so I'm not going to add to the noise. What I will say is if it hadn't been for that year, we wouldn't be homeschooling, and our family is happier than ever because of this choice. Beauty from the chaos.

Moving on….

We didn't choose to homeschool because the few months of virtual learning we had were so amazing. I think teachers are rockstars, and they did an incredible job pivoting and doing their best in an impossible situation. What made us decide to homeschool is that no matter what, we felt that what we would be going back to was a volatile environment that wouldn't serve our kids’ particular personalities.

That first year though? I fumbled my way through. I was really excited about all the freedom we were about to gain in designing our own days. No more running out the door to get to school on time. No more feeling like our kids were only home to do their homework and go to bed. No more feeling rushed to have a meal together. No more being where we were told to be. Basically, homeschool equaled freedom, but not necessarily a free-for-all with zero schedule. 

But the mistake I made? Thinking our day had to look like a traditional school day. I chose a curriculum that took us all of 6-7 hours per day to get through. It was heavy book-based, not very hands on/real-world experience learning…which is what we wanted in the first place. I think the fear of messing our kids up royally and landing them in loads of therapy as adults got in the way of the bravery it takes to design something that speaks to our kids’ individual strengths. 

However, that first year we did have a tutor who taught our kids Spanish with three other homeschooling families. It was the highlight of the week. Our kids all grew so close, and it felt like a throwback to a one-room-schoolhouse – further cementing my obsession with the times Laura Ingalls lived in – do you know of my Little House on the Prairie obsession? It’s real. I knew that should we continue to homeschool, I needed to build in more of what those Spanish days brought into our lives.

The Second Year

The next year we got more brave in designing our school year, and asked the kids to be involved in choosing what they would be learning. We looked at what typical kids their ages learn in a traditional school setting, but we also weren’t afraid to go off the rails to give our kids something unique and truly tailored to them.

We wanted to claim that freedom that so many homeschooling families talked about, and being tied to books like we were the previous year did not offer said freedom. We decided to use Seton Home Study School - Catholic Homeschooling for religion and math, we did many experiments from Home Science Kits for Kids & Students, and we used The Good and the Beautiful for everything else.

We also continued with our Spanish tutor, and asked her to help us a day-and-a-half each week; this allowed me to continue to work and schedule personal appointments on the days she was here. More than that? Her values lined up perfectly with our family’s so she was able to teach them in such a unique and beautiful way. 

The Third Year; Our Comprehensive Homeschooling Curriculum 

I still consider ourselves beginners, but this third year has been the best yet. We’ve gotten so good at knowing what helps our kids to thrive, and how they each learn in their unique way. I’ve learned to read the room and decide when to push our way through math, or if it would be more beneficial to just skip it and have a read-aloud and library day and come back to it, fresh, the next day. I’ve learned that part of the beauty of homeschooling is that the kids learn just as much simply living everyday life with me, and sometimes a day spent helping a friend who is pregnant and just had surgery is even more advantageous than time with our books. They’re learning in the traditional way, yes, but also in a way that can’t be replicated in a classroom. 

So what are we doing this year?

We're using Seton Home Study School - Catholic Homeschooling for Math, Religion, and Science, in conjunction with CrunchLabs by Mark Rober for experiments. We use The Good and the Beautiful for everything else (they’re ELA curriculum is amazing). We joined a homeschool co-op that meets every other week for gym, art, baking, Toastmasters, drama, field trips, and more. It’s amazing how big the homeschooling community is once you find something like this in your area; just google it! The kids have taken to helping Adam make maple syrup on our land, and they also started a business around our two alpacas selling goods made from their fiber and manure…no, I’m not kidding. Check out Rustic Road Alpacas Inc.!

We go to mass and Bible study most Fridays as a family, and if we feel like taking the day off to do a hike, work on our businesses, or go on our own field trip, we do! We still have the same tutor, Ms. Vogel, who helps us 1-½ days per week where she continues to focus on Spanish, History, our Catholic faith (and how the two tie together), Civics, and everything in between…she’s a Godsend! We’ll also be traveling to the Eternal City (Rome) for religion on steroids this coming fall, along with Orvieto, Assisi, and Siena.

Is this a traditional education? No.

Will they be missing certain aspects that other kids get? Sure.

But for us, we feel like they are gaining so much more through this route. And even considering all of the question marks and worries, I know that I’d still have worries if they were in a traditional school….just about different things. So I’m picking my worries, and going with team homeschool, because now that we are in it, I know it's the best choice for us.

Are you contemplating homeschooling?

I’ve answered some common questions with hopes that it will help you made a decision that is best for your family.

You’re seriously going to homeschool highschoolers?

Yes, I am. I have faith that I'll be equipped. Not because I think I can do it better than a teacher, but because the very nature of homeschooling teaches a child how to teach themselves/learn anything. I've seen our kids grow and blossom and learn far more on their own because we've given them free reign to chase their passions, which aren't always in line with a specific curriculum. And in turn? They've taught themselves how to learn and think for themselves. 

Aren't you afraid they won't get enough socialization?

This question kind of drives me crazy; our kids are actually around more people and more experiences as homeschooled kids because we have the freedom to design our days. Every kid/adult who was once homeschooled, that I’ve met, have been some of the most empathetic/kind/interesting/wise people I know. Proof in the pudding.

Aren't you sick of always having them in your face?

Truth be told, I had zero interest in homeschooling when we had kids. I wanted my them in school. In fact, I loved that first day back to school, back when my kids attended a traditional brick and mortar. After 3 months of playing amateur cruise director over the summer, I finally had the house back to myself. I'd take the necessary pictures to post on social media, drop them off, maybe be sad for 1.2 milliseconds, and quickly get over it while settling in to watch 16 Candles, Pretty in Pink, or anything with Molly Ringwald while drinking champagne…

Don't judge me.

But then I realized the amount of time we get with our kids living under our roof is miniscule; I wanted to cherish every moment. There’ll be plenty of time for Molly and bubbles when they move out.

What about testing…Aren't you concerned with their lack of testing? And what about the curriculum?

I know! What about testing. What am I supposed to do there? Should I be worried they won't spend 47 hours doing those standardized Iowa tests or whatever they are called? How in the world do I even begin picking a curriculum when every blog claims to know the best, yet they are all recommending something different? The answer…trust. The appeal of homeschooling overran the fear I felt about going against the grain, so I decided to stop stressing and just trust that I was chosen to be their mom for many specific reasons. And if we were feeling pulled to homeschool, this was one of those reasons! God won’t let me let them down.

What about life's milestones like prom, homecoming, and sports?

And what if I never get those prom pictures? Or if they miss out on varsity jackets? Do they even have those anymore? And Friday night football games? The truth is, homeschool kids are typically welcome to participate in most local schools’ extracurriculars, so this is a moot point. If they are meant to be there, they will be!

And college?

Did you know most universities, should our kids choose to go that route, actually have a different enrollment process for homeschool kids? And as far as the ACT goes, all you have to do is find out what schools in your area are hosting an ACT test and when, register, and use the practice tests on their website. Easy peasy!

All of this to say, yes, we may have found our sweet spot but it started through fire and a lot of error! We were simply brave enough to just pick something and see how it worked for us. When it didn’t, we pivoted. When I saw holes, we added. When something wasn’t working, we got rid of it. We found a homeschooling community we love, and once you have that, an entire world you don’t even know exists opens up. You start to see how much your kids can thrive and flourish in unexpectedly wise and very grown up ways.